Turning 30

I am always striving to be the best version of myself, especially at this juncture in my life.

I am about to turn 30 years old in a few days, and I find myself thinking back to how I envisioned my life would be at this point. 

Like most children, I was conditioned to believe at 30 I would have a booming career, white picket fence in the ‘burbs, a happy marriage, and children at the “old” age of 30. 

In my teenage years, I realized I would prefer to have a booming career, retro apartment in a big city, a few casual boyfriends, and a small dog. 

Days away from 30 and I am currently unemployed, living out of a suitcase in South America, in a long distance relationship, with no dependents of any kind. 

Funny how that works right? 

The beauty is I have chosen to defy the social norms and try something new- just to see how it suits me. Why not? I mean I am only 30 for goodness sakes! I have the whole world ahead of me, and I know that now! 

On the same token, I am “technically” an adult. I know I have responsibilities as a citizen, but I also know they are different than the ones society has always tried to press upon me. 

The general public in my country says I “should”:

Own property, or else I am irresponsible.

Pick a career and stick with it, or else I’m lazy.

Procreate asap, or else I am selfish. 

I understand why people feel the pressure from our matrix-like culture to run on a hamster wheel and just do what “everyone” else is doing, just because “everyone” is doing it. The pressure is unreal to conform to societies ideals. Most people don’t want to feel like the black sheep, or go against the grain because it feels so taboo to not be widely accepted. 

I say fuck it. 

I want to try something different and see what happens! Because I know there is a better way. Other people have found this improved quality of life, and I want it too. 

Recently it has become “trendy” to travel. But it’s not only for the instagram content, despite what it may seem sometimes.  It is also not just about ditching responsibility and aimlessly traveling the world.

Nomands and expats are on a misson because we have realized there is SO much to experience on the road outside the four walls of our hometown. The momumental impact travel has on your spirit truly is priceless. 

Yes, I have some awesome photos, and yes I am having a blast everywhere I go. But there is so much more to what I am doing than just what social media portrays. It is about the personal journey

It is about self growth.

It is about spirituality.

It is about a wider education of the world.

It is about freeing onseself from confinement. 

It is about connecting with different people. 

It is about a freedom that can’t even be described, because you must feel it.

I have made the conscious decision that my 30’s aren’t going to be about obtaining the things people think I “should” have. 

I know I’ll be going back to America eventually, and I know I’ll need a job and a place to live. I know I’ll have a relationship, and eventually children, and the dog. But for now, my goals are coming from a different angle.

My goals are to be the best person I can be.

To have a career that serves my higher purpose.

To take better care of my mind, body, soul.

To feel inner peace.

To deal with all my internal shit.

To shrink my ego.

To surround myself with like minded people.

I am working on a new complex piece of myself every single day out here on the road. Uncovering more and more about myself through every experience.

One day I am learning patience, when dealing with loud ass roommates in my dorm.

The next day, I am diving deep into a hypnosis and past life regression session to learn more about distant energies I may be holding onto. 

After that, I learn I REALLY need to stop eating junk food because I am sick to my stomach after stupid late night chocolate and chips cravings. Am I ever going to learn my lesson on this one??

Then, I wake up and read my book on nueroscience and how to refire my brain to be happy and manifest what I desire. 

At night, I go out to a bar only to understand drinking and dancing on bars no longer feels “good” like it did at 21. I feel like a wreck. 

Then, I yogi out, write in my journal, and reflect on my feelings. 

Next, I zen out and meditate all day while fasting. I then embark on a natural medicine ceremony that opens up a whole new dimension and awakens a new part of my soul I’ve been avoiding.

The next day, I get into a sticky situation at the airport where I feel unsafe and scared, and need to find a solution quickly to avoid being stranded only to have a nervous breakdown and need to learn how to deal with it. 

I am more consciously aware then ever before that every experience is a new lesson molding me into the person I want to be, if I chose to learn from them that is. 

I am about to be 30, and I view this current chapter as a sacred time to truly shape who I want to be for the rest of my life. 

This journey for me is to learn about the inner depths of my soul so that I can use that as fuel to hopefully inspire others to do the same. 

I constantly want to grow, I constantly want to be better. Not better for my ego, but better for the world.